You can have the best of me

Well, I don't have much to say tonight. The song "The Best Of Me" has been suck in my head tonight because it seems to fit exactly how I feel right now. It's late and I should of gone to bed hours of go but I just couldn't sleep. I couldn't stop the tears that kept falling caused from the hurt of being so from far away. Sleep will do me well I know and I wasn't ready for it just then, but I'm ready for it now, I'm ready to fall asleep and dream. Dream of not being so far away and close again. So goodnight and hopefully sweet dreams.

The Best Of Me by Starting Line

Tell me what you thought about when you were gone

And so alone

The worst is over

You can have the best of me

We got older

But we're still young

We never grew out of this feeling that we wont give up

Here we lay again

On two separate beds

Riding phone lines

to meet a familiar voice

And pictures drawn from memory

We reflect on miscommunications

And misunderstandings

And missing each other too

Much to have had to let go

Turn our music down

And we whisper

"Say what you're thinking right now"

Tell me what you thought about when you were gone

And so alone

The worst is over

You can have the best of me

We got older

But we're still young

We never grew out of this feeling that we wont give up

Jumping to conclusions

Made me fall away from you

I'm so glad that the truth has brought back together me and you

We're sitting on the ground and we whisper

"Say what you're thinking out loud"

Tell me what you thought about when you were gone

And so alone

The worst is over

You can have the best of me

We got older

But we're still young

We never grew out of this feeling that we wont give up

Turn our music down

And we whisper

We're sitting on the ground

And we whisper

We turn our music down

We're sitting on the ground

The next time I'm in town

We will kiss girl

We will kiss girl

Tell me what you thought about when you were gone

And so alone

The worst is over

can have the best of me

We got older

But we're still young

We never grew out of this feeling that we won't

Feeling that we can't

That were not ready to give up

We got older, but we're still young

We never grew out of this feeling that we wont give up

Like PB and J...

Well today was an little of everything in many aspects...hurt, laughter, awkwardness, tiredness, to just name a few. I had much on my mind so my drive home was good in many ways. A somewhat 30ish minute drive is a good time for reflecting on different things and did just that tonight as I do most drives home. I normally have my itouch or a cd playing quietly or loud, depending on the mood i'm in and how tired I am. Well tonight I had the radio playing and the song Shake It by Metro Station came on. There are just some songs that play

and you instantly think of a memory involving someone, a place, time in your life or all three.

That song is one of those songs. I instantly think of the fall of '08, freshman year of college, and the lovely amazing Britany Miller. That song use to play a lot on the radio while we drove in my old car for late night runs to Walmart for Jones and Reese's Puffs or Taco Bell for chicken quesadillas and strawberry fruista freezes. I started to think about Britany and I and freshman year. So much has happen since than. We became the two girls of a group of best friends that pretty much spent every weekend together. We fell in love with boys and both felt such hurt and heartache when they left. We've laid out under the stars and talked for hours about the future and past and present. And we've done crazy things late at night that we know we would have the most fun doing together. We've gone to concerts of our choosing and one we would never thought we were would end of there at the end of the day but we were thrilled because we got to be

together. We were bold and got piercings and spend many of late nights and weekends at SAU.

I'm so glad that fall, September day, in the park by SAU, with our Ben and Jerry's, Britany and I actually made the effort to become better friends. God knew we needed each other in our lives, a best friend at that time. So many of my memories and pictures include Brit, I love that girl. I love how when I'm around her I'm me and I don't have to act any other way because I know she loves me. I love her sense of style and that we are still cool, well think we are anyways, enough to get matching clothes or whatever. She is such a beautiful, intelligent, creative, Godly woman that i'm privileged to have as one of my best friends. And probably if it wasn't for her friendship and introduction, I mightn't have not met another one of my best friend that I love so much and am happy beyond words that he is in my life now as well.

Things have changed a lot since that first semester of college, but Britany is still one of my best friends that I love dearly and thank the lord for her friendship. Plus, she's still always there when I'm having a crappy day, and ready to eat some Ben and Jerry's ice crean with me ;) Well, that is all that's coming to me right now because it is pretty late or early, depending on how you look at it, and I should get some sleep. So goodnight and sweet dreams.

Us and our Ben and Jerry's. We love our ice cream.

The start of our crazy, awesome college friendship.

We knew it was going to be a good year because we would have each other.

Britany's and Koz's fall break 2008

We have many laughs together, especially when we need them the most. May 2010.

I love her. Summer 2010.

"You are the light to my soul. You are my purpose...you're everything."

I miss my summers, especially my mission trips. My summers before this one and lasts always consisted with adventure to other countries, I miss that. I miss going to a different country and getting your expectations of what it's going to be like crushed, and than made new and better than you could of imagined. Just before my sophomore year of high school I experienced my first mission trip to another culture and country. Guatemala. I got my passport and I was on pumped about going on a mission trip. It was exciting and new, and I couldn't wait. Everyone was focused one thing, serving the Lord with their whole heart. It was my first summer I worked at Barakel too, which I was also excited about but this was different kind of missions.

Guatemala, was amazing. I couldn't of had a better group and leaders. Sarah went with me, that was a condition my parents made before they gave me the ok to go. Which I am glad she got to go with me, especially when I got sick at the end of the trip which wasn't that awesome. Anyways we were based in Chichicastenango, the heart of a busy Guatemala market town. The goal of the trip was to build two house for two widows and her families, but we did so many other things too. We help build another house that was located in ChiChi more as well as go to a feeding program to help serve food the the children. I loved every minute of it. I love the feel of experiencing new things and places, but mainly the love of God that I saw and felt in Guatemala.

The love I saw in the teens that made up that team. That took ten days of their summers to go and serve others and their God. I saw love in the eyes of the widow and her family as we gave them a house they could call their own. Love in the eyes of the many children because we took the time to just play with them.

I've gone on two missions trip, Guatemala and the Dominican Republic. Both trips while I was in high school and I came away with so much from each. I learn to love God and show love to others. I was thankful, oh was I thankful for the life and things of it God blessed me with. On missions trips it's so easy to focus on God, he's all around you and His presences is clearly their and pointed out. It's hard coming home and knowing deep down your flame is going to dye down no matter how much to try and say it won't.

I'm trying something new. I'm going to try and rebuil

d that fire I felt my sophomore year of high school. I've been unsure about my future in some areas and not knowing what I really want, but this I know without a doubt. I want to be on fire for Jesus Christ. I want to make that flame burn stronger and longer. I want to love Him even more because he is my best friend and always there. I want to give it all to Him because His plan and timing is soo much better than mine could ever be. I want to love God with all that I am.

I believe in Christianity as I believe that the sun has risen: not only because I see it, but because by it I see everything else. -C.S. Lewis

First, I love C.S. Lewis. He was just an amazing man. I love this quote of his, it's perfect and so true. I feel like this is what mission trips are all about and the life Christians should lead. We should show others God's love by being love. Because then if other see God's love in us, even just a little bit, it opens their eyes. It opens their eyes to see and question the world and views that they believe to be true. People in Guatemala might not of accepted Christ as their Savior right then and there, but it open their eyes to see something bigger than themselves. The love we as believers showed them could of opened their eyes just a little bit to the love of Jesus Christ.

Anyways, as it's very late and I should of been sleeping hours ago. Oh well. As I finish typing this the song Everything by Lifehouse has been on my mind. Such an amazing song, I truly love it. So, goodnight, and remember to love God and show His love to other.

Guatemala 2006

With the widow and her family as we give the their new house

Feeding Program

Singing with the kids at a feeding program

Working together to building the widows house

Well, I don't have much to say tonight. The song "The Best Of Me" has been suck in my head tonight because it seems to fit exactly how I feel right now. It's late and I should of gone to bed hours of go but I just couldn't sleep. I couldn't stop the tears that kept falling caused from the hurt of being so from far away. Sleep will do me well I know and I wasn't ready for it just then, but I'm ready for it now, I'm ready to fall asleep and dream. Dream of not being so far away and close again. So goodnight and hopefully sweet dreams.

The Best Of Me by Starting Line

Tell me what you thought about when you were gone

And so alone

The worst is over

You can have the best of me

We got older

But we're still young

We never grew out of this feeling that we wont give up

Here we lay again

On two separate beds

Riding phone lines

to meet a familiar voice

And pictures drawn from memory

We reflect on miscommunications

And misunderstandings

And missing each other too

Much to have had to let go

Turn our music down

And we whisper

"Say what you're thinking right now"

Tell me what you thought about when you were gone

And so alone

The worst is over

You can have the best of me

We got older

But we're still young

We never grew out of this feeling that we wont give up

Jumping to conclusions

Made me fall away from you

I'm so glad that the truth has brought back together me and you

We're sitting on the ground and we whisper

"Say what you're thinking out loud"

Tell me what you thought about when you were gone

And so alone

The worst is over

You can have the best of me

We got older

But we're still young

We never grew out of this feeling that we wont give up

Turn our music down

And we whisper

We're sitting on the ground

And we whisper

We turn our music down

We're sitting on the ground

The next time I'm in town

We will kiss girl

We will kiss girl

Tell me what you thought about when you were gone

And so alone

The worst is over

can have the best of me

We got older

But we're still young

We never grew out of this feeling that we won't

Feeling that we can't

That were not ready to give up

We got older, but we're still young

We never grew out of this feeling that we wont give up